5 Things

Luke 17:7-10

“Will any one of you who has a servant plowing or keeping sheep say to him when he has come in from the field, 'Come at once and recline at table'? Will he not rather say to him, 'Prepare supper for me, and dress properly, and serve me while I eat and drink, and afterward you will eat and drink'? Does he thank the servant because he did what was commanded? So you also, when you have done all that you were commanded, say, 'We are unworthy servants; we have only done what was our duty.'”

“Thing upon thing.

Not thanked.

Not charging the overseer with being unfair or harsh.

Not prideful.

Christianity 101.” ~Pastor G.

I have had a lot of days like this. I'll be honest I have forgotten to eat meals on days like this. And I will also be honest in saying there's a part of that doesn't want to have days like this any more.

I think that must be because I try to do this in my own strength a lot. Or because I have forgotten the fruit that was yielded. Because I feel the aches and pains in my body but not the joy in my heart. And that there should settle that I did it in my own strength too many times, because if I don't feel the joy I wasn't serving in the strength of Holy Spirit.

But now I let my mind search for days when I have done this and felt full joy. I think of when we went to Esquintla on Saturday. We woke early, I brought along a sandwich and water. People shared their snacks with me for which I was thankful. It was hot dusty, my throat felt parched much of the time, and my eyes were stinging by the end of it. But that is not the memory that stands out to me. What is fully ingrained in my memory, are faces and names and smiles. Monica, a little girl who smiled and was very inviting to everyone. I remember hearing the BuildinGuate Team we were with talking about how Monica was asking about someone on their team who had not been back for a while. This little girl was concerned not with her own troubles but with what was going on with the BuildinGuate team. Next I remember Javier, and a boy who's name I could not hear properly or pronounce. When I asked him to write it he spelled it Iertc I think. I remember Javier Drawing picture after picture and wondered how he was getting so many papers, but he was so excited to draw. I still see the tree and some of the flowers he drew, and in one of the pictures a ring, which he told me en espanol es anillo.

I remember Iertc, who worked steadily on one picture for most the time that Javier ran back and forth grabbing markers and paper. It was a house with a path and flowers 3 windows and a door. The colors he chose after drawing his outline were bright, and though it was not hyper realism at all, the amount of time and work he put into it made it beautiful. I remember Meeting an older woman by the name Francisca, She had two little boys with her, we walked passed her and I greeted her with the typical Buenas Tardes, but her gaze held mine as I was about to turn away, so I gave her my full attention and introduced myself. What I remember clearly about her was her smile, it was incredibly warm and welcoming. A smile, such a small thing and yet it left such an impact. There are many more memories of playing with the kids and being drawn on with markers. I smile when I remember them. Why do I say all of this? Thing upon thing, that day was long without much comfort, but I felt complete joy, I did not feel I needed to be thanked by the end of it, I almost felt the size of lunch was unfair once or twice but that was more my own doing because I dropped one of my pieces of ham, and by the end of it I did not feel a worthy servant. There was still so much to do, and I wished I could do more, I walked away feeling like the one blessed, Feeling I had not given so much as I had taken. I felt and unprofitable servant.

Then we got back and our team building was feeding each other. That was honestly where I started having less of a servant heart, and I really did not like that team building. I hate letting people do things for me when they probably don't want to. Especially something I can for myself. To me it was a humiliating experience, and I am thankful Autumn was so gracious about it. Somehow we got through it. A meal was had, and despite all the mistakes I made and the mess I made, I feel we grew closer through it.

And that was the point.

God does not need us to serve. He can do the job ten times better without me. But He wants to do something in me, not just through me. There was so much more to do in Esquintla, so much that I know I am not a worthy servant. And the amount God did in me that day was far more than what He did through me. I think a big part of that was all the prayer before going that day. So when those long days come, I must remember the joy of the Lord is my strength, or else all I will remember is the soreness and pain in my body.

Application.

Don't do thing upon thing in your own strength, but let the Joy of the LORD be your strength.

How?

During my devotions tomorrow I will make a point to ask for God to fill me will His strength and joy. For a fresh filling of His Holy Spirit.